Dad Wisdom: Teach Your Children How to NOT Become a Zombie

Since we are rapidly approaching Halloween, I thought it appropriate to write something that is both meaningful and spooky!

Drawing inspiration from zombies, today’s message is about teaching our children how to deal with emotionally difficult, past events.

Zombies are very alive in our culture! I am no horror expert, but it is apparent zombies are by far the most popular nightmare character today.

I mean seriously, vampires suck.

Werewolves are nothing but “rare wolves.” “Hey, Wolfie. If you want to be top dog in Monster Town, you have to come around more than once every 29 days.”

All puns aside, I do find it odd that zombies are the most popular monsters. Vampires are so suave and sophisticated. They are those “tall, dark and handsome monsters.” Werewolves have that mystical quality. And, just like real wolves, werewolves are social. They look out for one another, like a family.

Zombies? I can’t think of a single zombie characteristic or quality that is redeeming or inviting.

They stink. They are ugly. And they have terrible manners when they eat.

Why then, are zombies so popular?

It just so happens that sociologists and social anthropologists have attempted to answer my “why are zombies so popular?” question. Those “smartie-pants” reference politics, certain presidents, war, drugs, the war on drugs, inequality, technology, and more things that I am very sure our children think about every day.

This explains why zombie costumes are so popular on Halloween for children under 13.

Listen, I am open to the hidden connection concept in pop culture offered by those Ph.D.s. But, I am a DAD, and my common-sense meter tells me that those explanations are BS.

I have a theory.

Zombies represent something that is potentially very destructive to everyone! And the older each of us becomes, the more vulnerable we are! Give me a drumroll, for I am about to enlighten the world as to the cause of the zombie phenomenon.

“Zombies represent each person’s past.”

Past events are like dead bodies in a graveyard. They cannot be brought back to life. Those events can never be changed. Keeping hurtful memories alive, is like raising the dead and creating zombies.

Dads and moms, we are living in a zombie apocalypse. If you don’t believe me, go to an airport or a mall and watch the adults. Scary I tell you, scary.

And that brings me to the crux of this article. It is essential that we parents teach our children how to deal with hurtful, past events. If we don’t, our children are at risk of becoming one of the millions of zombies that are roaming the world today.

Have this conversation with your children.

If you spend too much time reliving the painful events of the past, the dead memories will come alive, and you feel just like you did when those painful events occurred. You will experience the pain all over, again. And as a result, you will:

• moan and complain, and sound like a zombie.
• tell your story over and over to others willing to listen, and you will eat their brains with your words. When this happens, they too will become zombies. Then, you will have to find new people with whom you can share your story. Once you start eating, it is hard to stop. Your past story will become your current identity, just like a zombie… the living dead.
• become dumb, and your decision making hindered because you can’t focus your thoughts, just like a zombie. They are kind of lacking in cognitive skills.
• become tense, stiff, unhealthy and exhausted as a result of the unresolvable stress, just like a zombie.
• become a zombie!

Instead, teach your children how to heal.

• Tell them that their thoughts are their Life-GPS.
• Teach them the power that comes from hope.
• Teach them what to do when it is too difficult to have hope. Teach them how to distract themselves; watching YouTube videos of kittens playing or babies racing are great options.
• Teach them about scabs, and teach them about time. Seriously. Every scab was once an open wound with blood seeping out. But with a little time, it stopped bleeding, and a scab formed. And eventually, no more scab.
• Teach them not to scratch off scabs. Kids are smart. They will get what you are saying.
• Teach them.

John, a.k.a dadofthreewinds